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Dr. DeCandia discusses the inspiration
and purpose of the C.A.R.E  curriculum

  • A relationship betrayal is traumatic. Infidelity has been found to occur in 25% of marriages (Gordon & Mitchell, 2020). 

  • Infidelity can cause prolonged distress that mirrors the symptoms of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD (Dean, 2011).

  • Studies suggest the impact upon the betrayed is significant, regardless of whether the infidelity was sexual, emotional, in-person,  or virtual (Guitar et al, 2017).   


  • Shame and the feeling that "this is just me" often prevents people from seeking help or finding the right help.

The C.A.R.E group draws from evidence based research on attachment injuries, post traumatic stress, interpersonal neurobiology and grief. It is a ten session program that provides education to help participants:

  • understand the physiology of trauma

  • identify and manage triggers

  • develop coping skills

  • access additional resources

  • reduce shame and isolation.

Angela Profile 2022.jpg

Dr. DeCandia is the Founder and Clinical Director of Essex Counseling Associates, in Montclair, NJ. She specializes in helping individuals and couples work through complex trauma and loss. In addition to infidelity trauma counseling, Angela works extensively with parents who have lost a child. 


She is a certified Emotionally Focused Couple Therapist and Supervisor and a founding member of the New York Center for Emotionally Focused Therapy, which provides education and training to therapists throughout the United States and abroad.  She is a passionate teacher and mentor of graduate students and early career therapists, and publishes and presents regularly on the topics of clinical supervision.


DeCandia Vitoria, A. (2020). Experiential supervision: healing imposter phenomenon from the inside out. The Clinical Supervisor


Wooley, S.M., Faller, G., Palmer-Olsen, L., & DeCandia-Vitoria, A. (2014). Training the emotionally focused therapist. In K. Jordan (Ed), Couple, Marriage and Family Therapy Supervision (pp. 327-346). New York, NY: Springer. 

Author's Message:

Diversity, Equity & Inclusion: I wish to acknowledge that infidelity causes distress across race, gender, religion, ethnicity, disability, and sexual orientation. I included groups in this project with whom I possess extensive clinical experience and expertise.  Non-binary, transgender, disabled, and polyamorous persons are not yet represented. This is an on-going project and I will endeavor to include additional groups over time.

Confidentiality & Privacy: I use stock images to protect client identities.



I wish to recognize the courageous women who shared their stories for the benefit of others. To all of you, I extend my deepest gratitude.  I would also like to thank my colleagues, Jaime L. Gilmore, LMFT and Andrew Hoffman, LMFT for giving their time to this project and sharing their experiences treating clients suffering from post infidelity trauma. 

Angela DeCandia, DSW, LCSW
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